Rude Customer on First Date Belittles Waitress And Gets His Just Desserts

Waiting on tables is hard work. First, you’re moving around on your feet all day, often carrying heavy trays of food. Plus, you have to have a good memory to remember who ordered what and know when to check back on a table to see if they need anything. Now multiply this by 5-15 tables, and you’ve got one busy waiter or waitress. On top of everything else, you have to juggle all of your responsibilities with a smile, or else you’ll not get good tips. In this fictional joke, a waitress tells how she ran into a very rude customer and just how he wound up with egg on his face.

(It is a busy Saturday night. During the dinner rush, I have been dealing with a table of two 2o-somethings on a date. The guy, a blonde, had found something to complain about every time I’ve walked by. Meanwhile, the brown-haired girl just blushes and stays quiet. They’ve finished their meal.)

Blonde Man: “Are you new here?”

Me: “No, sir. I’ve been a waitress here for two years and three years at [other restaurant] prior.”

Blonde Man: “Then you have no excuse for how terrible this service was. The salad was wilty, and the entree was way too cold, and you were nowhere to be found. Plus, this place is far too noisy; I could barely hear myself speak! Honestly, I get better service at a fast food place.”

Me: “I’m sorry you feel that way. While there isn’t much I can do about the noise, I did offer to bring you different food before, but you said no.”

Blonde Man: *waves me off* “Just bring me the check, and try not to be so slow about it for once.”

(I go and get the check, but when I return, his date stands up and hands me a $2o bill.)

Girl: “Here, this is your tip. He wasn’t going to give you one. As a former waiter myself, I thought you were doing a perfectly fine job. My food was great, and the service was fast even though you’re so busy right now.”

(She turns to her stunned blonde date.)

Girl: “People like you made my job so much worse, especially for making us work that much harder for no tip. So thanks for the meal, but you can go ahead and delete my number because there will be no second date. And by the way, potjevleesch is supposed to be served cold, you idiot.”

(With that, she left the restaurant without him. It made the whole night worth it, to see that blonde man speechless.)

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